net

net:  [net]

~NOUN:  ANYTHING SERVING TO CATCH~
 
i read this blog religiously (as well as her book, which has changed me in ways that are indescribable, but i'll try in another post).

she speaks of her "net."  her group of girlfriends that she can count on through thick and thin, no matter what.

as she describes it, this net seems quite large and diverse....made up of many different layers of women.

some who are mutual friends.

some who are not.

some who like each other.

some who are odds with one another.

but still, when the time calls for it, the net comes together to cradle the one in need.

i have, shall we say, "challenges" with cultivating relationships with other women.  i have been betrayed and hurt in various and sundry ways that have jaded me.

after years of work, i now enter relationships with cautious optimism.

yet, i am still slow.  very slow to trust.  to be open.  to be vulnerable.

then, this happened.

slowly...very slowly...i shared the news with my closest girlfriends.

next, i took a leap of faith and shared with a couple of girlfriends that didn't know me as well and who i kept at arms length for a variety of reasons.

but now, in the midst of chaos, i wanted to let them in...to see a very fragile, vulnerable part of me.  

i didn't know what would happen.  i didn't know what the reactions would be.

so, i waited....without expectation....

....and not very long.

now?  i struggle to find the words to express the gratitude i feel in my heart.

the abundance of support, kindness, and straight-up unbridled love i have received from these beautiful women is unparalleled and something that has touched my heart and changed me in ways that i know i still haven't fully recognized.

oh, i have a net, my friends.

it is strong.

it is amazing.

it is beautiful.

i wouldn't change it for the world.

lise, melissa, anna, teran, amy, niki, stefanie, and tracey - you each are a very special blessing in my life.  i love you.

xoxox -